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RiSE of ThE wIcKEd

Jul. 11th, 2008

02:03 pm

Zachary Ryan
Introduction to Shakespeare
July 11th 2008

Petruccio: How are you my Kate? Sweetheart what has you all upset/sad?
Hortensio: how are you miss?
Katherine: Hope, seems distant
Petruccio: Cheer up dear, be happy to see me.
Here, babe, look how hard I have worked for you
I got this meat ready for you myself (Rebhorn, 1995) (Oxford University Press, 2008) (Cahn, 1975)
You have to at the least thank me for doing that
Nothing?! Fine you must not want it.
Despite all my efforts you don’t even care.
Here, take it away.
Katherine: Please, don’t get rid of it.
Petruccio: You would thank somebody for doing less for you,
And you are going to thank me before you get anywhere near what I’ve made.
Katherine: Thanks sir.
Hortensio: Oh come on man, its your fault. (OED)
Kate you can come hang out with me.
Petruccio: {aside}Eat it up, Hortensio, if you are the one that really cares about me.
{to Katherine}It will do you some good.
Kate, eat quickly, and now sweetie,
We will go back to your father’s
And partake in all the pleasantries and look as all the other guests
With silk coats, hats, and gold jewelry
With stylish and ornamental clothing and snappy starched collars,
With gemmed bracelets, beads, and other expensive accessories,
What have you eaten? The tailor is waiting on you
To get you dolled up with his decorative clothing.
Come, tailor, let’s see what you have made.
Bring the gown.
What’s new with you sir?
Haberdasher: here is the cap you asked for.
Petruccio: It looks like it was just made from a breakfast bowl
A dish that you threw velvet on, it is slutty and trashy
Its just the shell of a muscle or walnut,
A kids hat, a joke, a baby’s cap.
Take it away! Make it bigger.
Katherine: I don’t want it bigger. Its stylish now, respectable women wear hats like these now.
Petruccio: When you act like a respectable woman you will have one too
Hortensio: (aside) That’s going to take awhile.
Katherine: I am guessing I have your permission to speak freely
And when and as much as I want. I am not a kid or toddler.
There have been better that have listened to what I have to say
And if you can’t, you should just plug your ears.
I am going to speak about how angry I am inside,
Or else I will go on heartbroken,
And rather than that I will be free,
And to the utmost with my speech.
Petruccio: What you are saying is true. It is a pitiful hat,
It is the crust of a pie on your head, a child’s distracting toy (OED), a silk pie.
I love that you do not like it.
Katherine: Whether you like me or not, I like the hat
And I am going to have it or nothing
Petruccio: How about your gown? Tailor, let’s see it.
Oh my goodness! What a theatrical costume we have here?
Is this a –sleeve? More like a canon.
And these designs are like the slits in a pie
Here cut and snip etc…
Just like scissors in a barber shop.
Why what in the hell tailor do you call this?
Hortensio: {aside} she is likely to have no cap and gown (by the end of this)
Tailor: You told me make it orderly and well,
According to today’s fashions
Petruccio: Yes I did, but if you remembered
I did not ask you to make it a mockery of today’s fashion.
Go peddling to every gutter home,
For you aren’t going to be working for my business, sir.
I’ll have none of it. So, make the best of it.
Katherine: I never saw a better fashioned gown,
More elegant, exquisite, or with better artistry.
It looks like you want me to look like a puppet (OED)
Petruccio: You’re right, he does want to make you look like a puppet.
Tailor: Sir, she is saying YOU mean to make a puppet out of her.
Petruccio: How rude! You are a liar, your thread,
your thimble,
Your penis: three quarters, half yard, smaller, smaller,
You flea(Williams) , you cricket, you parasite, worthless contemptible tailor, (OED)
Attacked {verbally} in my own house, by this little man.
Away you beggar, whatever is left of you,
Or I will beat you with your own yardstick/penis
And you will think about this ass-kicking as long as you live.
I am telling you, you messed up her gown.
Tailor: Sir, you are mistaken. The gown is made
just as you asked for it.
Grumio told me how it was to be done.
Grumio: I didn’t tell him how to make it I just gave him the supplies.
Tailor: But did you not request to have it cut?
Grumio: You have undertaken many things
Tailor: I have.
Grumio: Don’t test me. You have dressed many people nicely. Do not test me.
I will be cut down or talked back to. I am saying to you that your patron wished the gown be cut; but not to pieces.
Therefore, you are lying.
Tailor: Why, here I have your order to prove it.
Petruccio: Read it.
Grumio: the note is lying if it says I did all of this.
Tailor: First, a revealing gown (slutty).
Grumio: Sir, if I ever asked for a slutty gown, make me wear
It and beat me to death with a spool of thread.
I said a gown.
Petruccio: Proceed.
Tailor: With a small flared cape.
Grumio: I confess to that
Tailor: With a wide sleeve.
Grumio: I confess to two sleeves.
Petruccio: Aha, there’s the problem.
Grumio: An error in the order sir…an error with the bill. I asked for the sleeves to be cut out and sewn up again, and that will prove that this little man is armed only with his thimble.
Tailor: What I am saying is true. If we were in a suitable place
You would know it too.
Grumio: Give me your lying order and yardstick and
Give it up.
Hortensio: Lord have mercy, Grumio, the man will have nothing left.
Petruccio: Well to be frank the gown is not for me.
Grumio: You are right sir it is for the Mrs.
Petruccio: Take it away for me.
Grumio: take away her dress so he can see to its USE.
Petruccio: What did you mean by that?
Grumio: Oh think a little harder and you will get it. ‘take away her dress so you can USE it.’ Haha.
Petruccio: Hortensio, please tell me you will make sure the tailor is paid.
Hortensio: Tailor, I will pay you for the gown tomorrow.
Don’t listen to his unkind ramblings.
Move along to your boss.
Petruccio: Well, come, my Kate. We will go to your father’s house even
Under these humble circumstances.
We shall have plenty, but our clothes won’t show it,
But the mind is what makes the body rich,
And as the sun breaks through the darkest clouds,
Honor too can be seen in the most meager of looks.
Is the jay more precious than the lark
Because his feathers are more beautiful?
Or is the serpent better than the eel
Because the color of his skin is appealing to the eye?
Oh no, good Kate, you aren’t like this either
Because of this poor clothing and ugly condition.
If you think it shameful then blame it on me,
And therefore move merrily ; we will continue
To feast and have fun at your father’s house.
Go call my men, and lets go straight there,
And bring our horses to Long Lane end.
There we will mount, and later walk on foot.
Let’s see, I think its seven
And we might make it there by noon.

Perhaps this is a double-entendre. “Meat” may double as it could today as sexual slang for the male member. Petruccio in this way suggests that perhaps he can tease her with meat in the sense of starvation and a sexual moratorium.
Baumin describes this as “ludic sophism.” It is ironic and illogical but altogether playful use of language. He says he wants to feed her and doesn’t and he carries on with his male bravado and depiction of Kate as a whore but does not act physically. (Baumin, 1989)

Rebhorn shares this idea of starvation on multiple levels, “Petruccio does not engage in sexual intercourse at all before the play ends and actually uses sexual deprivation as one of his methods for controlling her in Act 4. Rebhorn also while not directly referencing meat does talk about many of Petruccio and Grumio’s rude jokes most notably the “rope tricks.”
Fie according to the Oxford English Dictionary is an exclamation disparaging shameful speech Hortensio could be talking about the sexual humor or just the general nature with which Petruccio is taking amenities from Katherine (OED)
A second play on the meat reference suggesting that Hortensio could satisfy him if he is more sexually ready than Katherine, or willing to sit down to the meal.

The Norton Anthology lists this as a mollusk shell; however, when referencing the Shakespeare glossary at absoluteshakespeare.com they list this as the weed in corn. Both definitions comment on Petruccio’s utter disdain for either the banality of the work or the frailty of its design. Moreover, corn according to William’s dictionary could be a double for semen.
Barber here could be part of a theme of Petruccio’s double entendre rant. Barber in William’s dictionary is a “syphilitic whore” that would apply to the insinuations that Petruccio is making about Kate and how appropriate the dress might be to her lifestyle. (Williams, 2002)e (Greenblatt, 1997) (Absolute Shakespeare, 2000-2005)
Puppet has changed meanings over time; however the play on words is effective with most of the dates listed in the Oxford English dictionary. Puppet can be a child’s play-toy; a woman lacking individuality in her fashion sense; and a person in status operating under the control of another. These all have reference when placed with this conversation and context.
Flea does have an entry in Williams’ dictionary; however it pertains to “sexual intimacy” in this regard Shakespeare’s purpose of belittling the tailor is rendered here.
Skein of thread most likely plays upon both the way Petruccio feels about the gown that is abhorrent to the eyes as well as to the penis joke and the fact the man is a “hopping” tailor. The fragment of the thread that the Norton Anthology defines this as is meant to belittle the Tailor in many different dimensions.
The actual lines reference “laying it on him” which could double as the blame and the dress. The next line contains the word “frolic” which according to Williams is “allusive to sexual activity.

Absolute Shakespeare. (2000-2005). Retrieved July 11, 2008, from ABSOLUTESHAKESPEARE.COM: absoluteshakespeare.com
Baumin, T. F. (1989). Petruchio the Sophist and Language as Creation in Taming of the Shrew. Studies in English Literature 1500-1900 , pp. 247-257.
Cahn, C. (1975). The Taming of the Shrew: Shakespeare's Mirror of Marriage. modern language studies volume 5 .
Greenblatt, C. H. (1997). The Norton Shakespeare . New York, London: W.W. Norton and Company Inc.
Oxford University Press. (2008). Oxford English Dictionary. Oxford: Oxford University Press.
Rebhorn, W. A. (1995). Petruchio's Rope Tricks: The Taming of the Shrew and the Renaissance Discourse of Rhetoric. Modern Philology , 304-321.
Williams, G. (2002). A Dictionary of Sexual Language and Imagery in Shakespearean and Stuart Literature. London and Atlantic Highlands NJ.

Jan. 26th, 2008

07:03 pm

Feb. 18th, 2007

02:43 am - Money is Everything

A mystifying experience that of watching the eyes slowly spelunk the sanguine caverns of the skull. As the pupils dilate and pilgrimage to their stealthy rest. The hazel and black bulbs seem to struggle, swinging like a pendulum within their orbit. An epiphany, I noticed the genesis engendered out of deletion: the capillaries sprouting from her lower lash prowl upwards clambering the blank canvas on the white of her eye. As proud as a redwood, full as an oak, and desolate as the southern palm, all embodied in the eyes’ death reflex. I anticipated feeling her neck clinch, and tendons panic in their fight reflex. Instead the ivory skin embraced inevitability, masculinity, and futility.

I gently caressed her brow and grazed my fingers through thick pasture of fragile hair. Immediately I thought this an odd gesture, one merely exculpatory, until that next moment. The sweet smell of sweat and strawberry lingered in my mind. An irretrievable feeling of home being a ubiquitous place, a fleeting glimpse of familial approval at a genocide, calls to home from a dank prison cell and hearing through the other line “ everything will be alright.” It was social euphoria. The sensations gushed into her bodily reflexes, and the desired screams were inhibited and fettered to mere whimpers and murmurs fronting the sanctity of all we were breaking.

The wet brick and cracked sidewalk breathed down my neck and embraced my awkward drunken gait. I stumbled into a flier for a tarot card reader.

"Miss Dumas, apprentice to Jupiter, and cousin to Saturn"

Not only did these relations with the planets make no sense to me, my current inebriation and long-standing feelings on fortune tellers compelled me to spit on Miss Dumas's likeness. I aimed for her wide eyed mystical nose but instead hit her hand that probed her goofy crystal ball.

I couldn't stop thinking about her. Not Miss Dumas, but HER. I thought about how she would have believed in this bullshit. I thought about how she believed in me. She was a believer, an everflowing spring of guile, naivety, and the lovable stupidity that has been time honored in tits. She would never let me stagger into light posts and use newspaper stands as crutches on a drunken mission for grease and smut. She would have never allowed the whiskey-cokes to touch my lips. Her mere presence the thought of her shadow eliminated all the dark fantasies I had at the moment. I dreamed that the blonde woman on her phone with the C-cup breast, maroon lipstick and white blouse pulled over her hardworking blue sedan, and sucked my dick right in the alley. I dreamed I punched that fraternity prick back to his fucking parents' house and he would walk in on his dad spanking his wide-bodied mother's fatass. This never happened with her I never dreamed of defiling her, or making love for that matter. I just dreamed that she would speak to me, brush into me, I yearned for her to grab my hand on the street remind me that I made her smile.

My lips quivered when my mind told them their task. The clean skin on the side of her neck begged for me. I watched the hair on her neck wave in acceptance with the hot breath I exhaled. Muscles clinched I hid the nervous twitches of my skin with the outermost exhibits of what a male is supposed to be. I tucked her body by the hip towards the warmth of mine. This chilling innocence prompted me to finally kiss her, igniting a sensous moan echoed from the source , resonated like a gun shot, and killed me.

I walked her street, and I stopped to suck in the humidity, sand-filled wind, and Old Southern neighborly nostalgia; all I could think about was puking and popcorn, I had to stop and sit on the grass, no matter how wet it was and how saturated my ass got.

Sep. 13th, 2005

04:38 am

The face in front of you...doesnt hate you....it just doesnt know that it should...it doesnt know that its meaningless...

stiff lifchens educate inherent within self capitulatory brows ....thine is fine for such a fine fucking day...eat my innards bitch

you are truly an idiot if you pretend to care or understand that

Jun. 9th, 2005

06:05 am

27% of U.S. male college students believe life is "a meaningless existential hell."


wow...ur thoughts?

Jun. 2nd, 2005

12:14 pm

will somebody get their ass up here and do my laundry.....I HAVE NO CLEAN CLOTHES .......NONE!!!!!!!

Jun. 1st, 2005

04:18 am

nonsense poopypants

May. 23rd, 2005

10:38 pm

fort myers sucks it gives cape coral tiger stripes.....for reference to what a tigerstripe is see my definition on urbandictionary.com it is the second listing...oh and by the way you suck still....and calso says pine island makes him wet...and im totally sober

May. 20th, 2005

03:23 pm

i think im the only one who was a little perturbed with star wars....it was cool...but it wasnt crazy good like everyone has made it out to be....i will put it this way....it was really cool one of the coolest ever, but extremely good i was not to borrow from Master Yoda....Natalie Portman and Hayden while doing a little better still have yet to light a fire under their asses to make them act with a little more passion...they are so stoic....props to ...in this order....grievous, yoda, ewan mcgregor and palpatine

May. 11th, 2005

02:10 pm

im so happy im going to give everyone on livejournal a tigerstripe

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